Frequently Asked Questions

Looking for answers? This is the place! If you need additional information, please email us.

What is PFLAG Ashburn/Loudoun County?
We are a group that facilitates support group meetings on a monthly basis. As of 2025, we are a certified chapter of the National PFLAG organization. Our support group meetings allow people in similar situations to discuss their experiences, successes, hardships, and learn from others to best support themselves and their LGBTQ+ family members. We structure each meeting to optimize your opportunity to talk or listen at your comfort. We require registration, which will get you added to our monthly reminder email list. All information collected is absolutely private and will never be shared. We are run by a Board of Directors made up of our Lead Facilitators.

​How are the meetings run?
Each meeting starts off with our "big circle" as we gather in the main room, socialize (or not!), get a name and pronouns sticker, and wait for the meeting to start. We begin each meeting with any announcements from the facilitators, reminders, and then we break into three groups. The groups go into three separate areas with facilitators for their support group until the end, when we reconvene in the main area. Each group is run a little differently but generally involve a check-in, updates from participants, and general discussion.

Who runs the groups?
Our team includes a diverse group of parents, professionals, and community members who have had background and security checks, on-the-job training and observation, and specific coordinated trainings to become a PFLAG facilitator. We aim to have two facilitators for each adult group and three for the youth group.

Why is the Student Group managed by another organization?
Because our chapter was recently elevated to the position as a chapter under the National PFLAG organization, we need to follow an official process to develop and retain a youth group. Accordingly, this process takes some time. Our local facility operators also serve as an experienced non-profit that has managed student groups for years as part of its mission. Accordingly, they are well equipped to help take on this unique challenge. All facilitators are experienced and trained members or allies of the LGBTQIA+ community and follow procedures in line with the PFLAG guidance.

​How do I join?
There is no joining requirement unless you are a youth member, in which case you need to have a parent register you and be present at meetings. We highly advise that you join the mailing list for reminders in the event any of our meetings change.

​What is the benefit of attending?
PFLAG is a national organization that facilitates support group meetings around the country. Support groups are not therapy, but they offer members of the LGBTQIA+ community and their allies a safe place to discuss what they are experiencing. Sometimes, just letting these feelings out in the world and finding out that others feel or have felt the same can help us find peace, security, and safety. This can also be a great place to make friends, find resources, and learn new information.

​What are the rules?
At the beginning of each meeting we reiterate our rules and each group may have their own specific rules that a facilitator will announce. The short version is that we focus on family problems and feeling in regards to coming out and relationships with family and friends. Confidentiality is a top priority, we can share situations but never names or identifying information. We are here to support one another but not to provide therapy. We can share our stories but should also be sensitive to and listen to the stories of others. We are supportive rather than confrontational, we do not judge each other. Everyone is given a chance to speak, no one is permitted to monopolize the conversation. Each person's remarks are important so we do not permit side discussions. Anyone who is uncomfortable should make this known to facilitators as our main concern is to create a safe and affirming atmosphere for all participants.

Can I observe?
We have a very strict policy on attendance that does not allow for observers. Because of the sensitive nature of our meetings and the trust involved in our participants, we will not allow those outside these communities to participate. We regularly receive requests from mental health professionals, researchers, and other well-meaning individuals who wish to learn more about the first-hand perspective of the LGBTQIA+ community for a variety of reasons, but this is not the place for that. Please feel free to reach out to another organization in the area, such as Equality Loudoun or Safe Space NOVA who offer services in these areas.

What other organizations operate in the Loudoun area?
We partner with a number of excellent community organizations in Loudoun County and the surrounding areas. LGBTQ+ serving organizations directly in Loudoun include Equality Loudoun, the Loudoun Pride Foundation, and Dulles Triangles. In the surrounding areas, a number of wonderful organizations include Casa Brumar, SafeSpace NOVA, Equality Prince William, FCPS Pride, Reston Pride, and Equality Fauquier.

What are your facilities like? Can I come how I feel comfortable?
Absolutely, you can always come as you are! Maybe you're experimenting with your look or a name or even new pronouns - this is your safe space. While we operate in a faith-based facility and know some folks may feel uncomfortable in a religious setting, the operators of the facility are an affirming church, Our meetings take place after hours when there are no services or faith events that would interfere. Our meetings are completely private and not open to outsiders. We ensure the building is secure at the start of each meeting (so please be on time!). The bathrooms are gender affirming and there is a non-gendered bathroom as well. Many of our attendees are transgender or gender non-conforming, so please know that you'll be safe, no matter who you are or where you are in your journey.

I am experiencing hardship or am in need, what resources do you offer?
PFLAG Ashburn/Loudoun County is a support group and does not offer direct services for individuals. We are lucky to have multiple groups in the area that consolidate and offer services. For most services, we recommend the Equality Loudoun Resources Page or to email their team directly at contact@eqloco.com. Otherwise, Casa Brumar offers housing support, SafeSpace NOVA offers therapeutic services, and Equality Loudoun provides referrals for local services.

Can you share my opportunity? Can I come speak with your group? Do you accept donations? Can you come to our rally?
PFLAG Ashburn/Loudoun County is centered on the individuals who we serve. We do not prioritize sharing events, opportunities, surveys, or other offerings from outside groups or individuals. We may choose to share opportunities only if they are directly applicable and beneficial to our groups either through our monthly email or meeting (not effective for time sensitive requests or events). Equality Loudoun offers an LGBTQ+ community calendar where events can be submitted. We will not, under any circumstances, share the information of our participants. We do not allow any individuals, groups, or organizations to speak at our events. We accept monetary donations only. We do not accept or facilitate donations of clothes, furniture, medical supplies, or other materials. We are not aware of any organization that accepts used medical supplies or clothes specific to transitioning. We suggest utilizing local groups like Woman Giving Back and LAWS, who serve local LGBTQ+ populations for such donations. We will not advertise political or legislative events to our membership, to include protests, rallies, town halls, or other similar events.